Walking Hand in Hand

A daily walk made special

These days I really enjoy my walk to work. It takes me exactly 16 mins from the door of my house to my desk. The roads are treelined and the weather is brilliant. But what I enjoy most is the second half of the walk through ITC Infotech's huge 37 acre campus. It is nature at its best. But the reason for my present post is a 2 minute sighting this morning which touched my heart - two old men walking hand in hand.

Walking hand in hand

One man was half blind by the looks of it and weak on the knees and legs. His movement heavily impaired by some kind of a paralytic stroke. He was wearing a checkered shirt and scruffy trousers. The other was in the traditional south indian whites - dhoti and shirt - made fashionable by our PC. He seems to be suffering from Parkinson's disease which was badly effecting his gait.

A odd old combination

What made the sight special was not the fact that I saw two old men walking together but the conditions of their walk. Singularly they would not appear to be able to even support themselves. Each looked more frail than the other. And you would not trust them together on a busy road on the morning of a working day. But together as they were walking hand in hand stuttering down the road there was a sense of stability about them which you would not have felt if they were walking alone. But each in his own way was supporting the other.

A mixed bag of feeling

The image was fixed in my mind and for a moment made me feel less strong. It also made me feel happy about each of them. But it also saddned me. These days the vagaries of the time have left many old people to fend for themselves. People like us - some out of choice and some of compulsion - have had to leave home and move out to some other cities. This leaves our parent on their own both financially and socially.

Mental & social displacement

The interest rates have dipped. Retired folks like my dad who had earlier thought they had secured their post-work future suddenly find their incomes having been halved. Add to this the tremendous pace at which our daily life is changing. Shopping at departmental stores, communicating through mail, availing apex fares, watching movies in multiplexes and banking through phone and ATM have made life easier but a little more unaffordable. These do not affect our parents financially but impacts their thought process and hastens ageing.

Hard money

They are ever apologetic to accompany us to the mall. They would rather spend their time in the evening relaxing in the house or strolling in the park. If we take them out to the restaurant they would be hesitant to order anything. Instead they prefer to go by what we choose ever complaining of the need to eat out. They moved up the hardway and worked hard for every penny. Money is a priceless commodity which needs to preserved.

Little expectations

We do send the occasional money and make the religious phone calls. They do visit us from time to time. However the fact of displacement and detachment cannot be denied. In our times money seems to have become the pivot around which all good times swing. For our parents enjoyment comes from more simpler things. From just being around their children and grandchildren.

Hypocracy?

But I guess I have put it all too simplistically. These days to be around with your parents looks to be Utopian. They are the ifs and buts, the may bes and could bes, the perhaps and the possible. Sometimes I wonder if I am a hypocrite.