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Jan 25, 2010

Imperfect Past, Future Tense?

There have been many yearnings to 'post'. Many flashes of titles. The letters floating around those titles, trying to get colored in the myriad hues of emotions that they come swimming in. However, the circumstances have not allowed me to sit by and allow those letters to sequence themselves in a post of mine.

I started writing a post about a couple of months back. The notepad file where I pen my post bears evidence to that. Eerily it was the same location where I am now. I was riding the Metra from Downtown Chicago to Lake Forest, my present nest. These were the exact words,

"Copenhagen. San Francisco. Boston. In the interim, glimpses Los Angeles, Washington D.C. and New York. Now Chicago. I am lucky to get glimpses of these great cities. I write this post, while I sit in the Metra, going back to my abode in Lake Forest from Chicago downtown."

But thats the only lines that I could write. When I am not busy with work, my mind is too busy either hanging onto the past or bringing in the thoughts and worries of the future. Each day I realize, that my present is sinking in the abyss of my thoughts.

When I look at others, I see how much they get done.

I feel I do not get much done inspite of the burn around of my life. The intensity of my workplace does not help either. My penchant to get soaked in, also adds to the challenge. But my circumstances are just like any other. It is not so special and neither am I so special.

Then what?